In honor Of TWILIGHT: NEW MOON being a success and Ruining a new era of moviegoers with it’s Romeo & Juliet with vampires storyline. I am rather tired of all this romanticism of vampires everywhere all of a sudden in books on television and in movies. Can a slasher get a hug. Vampires are always so Romantic, distinguished and classy sort of like the myth applied to Europeans. That I tend to like the films that give you more of a realistic portrayal. That look at it as more of a curse you have been infected with. That make it seem more like a drig addiction you have been infected with that you can’t quit or you die.  One of the problems is that there has been plenty of films with vampires in them that don’t really feel like or to me count as vampire movies.  I have decided to make a list of vampire movies that might be more entertaining then any TWILIGHT movies.

THE GOOD

-         The Lost Boys

-         Let The Right One In – if you haven’t seen it go now

-         Near Dark – A Classic

-         Thirst

-         Blade 2

-         Bram Stoker’s Dracula – Campy But I like the Design of the film and enjoyed it as a child and surprisingly still do

-         Interview With the Vampire – Though the book is better

-         Buffy The Vampire Slayer: The Series

-         Angel: The Series

-         Vamp

-         Fright Night

-         From Dusk Til Dawn

THE BAD

-         Underworld 2 – Actually more enjoyable then the original but still more style then substance

-         Blade

-         My Best Friend Is A Vampire – Cute and Cheesy

-         Buffy The Vampire Slayer: The Movie

-         Shadow Of The Vampire

-         Fright Night 2

-         The Hunger

-         The Addiction

THE UGLY

-         Underworld – more style then substance

-         Blade: Trinity

-         Queen Of The Damned

-         The Forsaken

-         Innocent Blood – Good idea, Bad Follow Through

Directed By: David Gordon Green
Written By: David Gordon Green; Based On The Novel By: Stewart O’Nan
Cinematography By: Tim Orr

Cast: Kate Beckinsale, Sam Rockwell, Olivia Thirlby, Amy Sedaris, Tom Noonan, Nicky Katt

I consider this a coming of age film less for centering around kids which most coming of age films caress at the center even though this film does have teenage characters this is more of a coming of age film for the adults who populate this story it is a sobering story that shows that most of these characters in there own way need to grow up and are in the process of doing it.

The main story of annie and Glen are like two characters who populate a country song once in love and as they grow older seperate but find they need each other because the days of dreams are coming to a end and reality is hitting hardcore. I think there story will ring true with a lot of audience members as it is a story that is happening more and more in different cultures around the world.

The film just like it’s snowy scenery has a emotional coldness and stillness that adds a hovering cloud of doom and desperation that is a cloud that never leaves this film.

The True Revelation here is Kate Beckinsale I have never really seen her in a dramatic part before and she goes with full flying colors she is excellent especially in the quiet emotional moments she has as much talent as she has beauty. Not that the rest of the cast is weak it is surprising to see Amy Sedaris who I have only seen in comedies in a dramatic part for once it’s a nice change. Sam Rockwell is good but I have come so accustomed to seeing him do great in any role he has taken it’s just a given he is going to be excellent why he is not touted in the same great acting circles as Ryan Gosling and Leonardo Dicaprio is puzzling maybe because he is rarely in studio films and constantly is working in the independent film arena.

David Gordon Green continues his style as the modern equivalent to Terrence Malick as chronicler of small town American life and exposes more of the reality of the situations that characters find themselves in without overdoing it as much as mainstream cinema will allow. I mean he doesn’t make Mumblecore movie about hipsters or go with ultra realism as Kelly Richert director of old joy but he definatley has a original voice all his own when it comes to cinema he is a gifted director and this film isn’t a disappointment not as good as his previous work but a good standard 

I say rent but prepared it’s not a feel good film which makes it all the more realistic people don’t pay for being wrong or bad life just goes on nothing comes out the way you expect it too.

GRADE:  B-

Cast: Clive Owen, Jude Law, Julia Roberts, Natalie Portman

Directed By: Mike Nichols
Written By: Patrick Marber
Cinematography By: Stephen Goldblatt
Editor: John Bloom & Antonia Van Drimmelen 

The beautiful thing about this movie is the words the language used which is both smart and cruel it’s amazing how sentences can hurt and destroy so much

This is not a film to watch if you are looking for action it’s more about Character , Drama and situations then anything else. This is just a adult relationship drama and everything here is beautiful.

This is a drama but feels more like a horror movie there are so many scenes of emotional violence that this is like watching a massacre. Since there are only four characters it’s easy to get to know the characters even though they don’t talk about there pasts much you get to know them so much that you feel the pain and despair that they do.

The Switching allegiances, mind games and harsh words make this like a british David Mamet film though you can tell the film is based on a play for it’s limited locations and exclusive intimate closed spaces that the action takes place in. Mike Nichols wisely knows how to open the film up to make it looks sumptuous.

Even though the cast is all good the person who walks away with the film is Natalie Portman this is what award winning acting is all about een thought she didn’t even get nominated it was a chance for her to escape her shackles of her teen and lightweight roles to show that she is not only grown but a fully sexual being. From her scene in the strip club where even though she is taking orders she is in total control while also letting herself be completely vulnerable by actually telling the truth for one of the first times in the film. To when she is being vulnerable when she is supposed to be running away with the love of her life. Mike Nichols also knows how to make this beautiful lady into a goddess with color, dress and showing just enough skin.

Cate Blanchett was originally cast in the Julia Roberts role she played the role in the play that Julia Roberts plays but she got pregnant and could not do the role so she was replaced by Julia Roberts who does pretty good in this role since this is really one of the few times where she plays a three dimensional character that is kind of like her usual self of being likeable but also capable of being hateful. There is no cutesy sweet girl we are used to here. Jude Law and Clive Owen were both also in the play but here they switched the roles they originally played. Both are too perfection.

The film also has a beautiful opening scene with the song the blower’s daughter by Damien rice that this movie seem to put on the charts for people to discover which in itself is a haunting song that hovers over the rest of the film     

A definite must see

Written & Directed By: Woody Allen
Cinematography By: Harris Savides
Editor: Alisa Lepselter

CAST: Larry David, Evan Rachel Wood, Patricia Clarkson, Ed Begley Jr., Samantha Bee, Michael McKean  

The film feels more like a play then a film just a play that uses a lot of exterior locations. Not that good of a play but a ok farce. The film just feels lazy like it has no energy. Which is a shame as it was coming off a Actual good film VICKY CHRISTINA BARCELONA

The main Attraction to see the Film is star Larry David but the results are not quite as good as you would think it would be. While playing a character it’s not too much a departure from him playing himself. Only here he is more of a downer and a scientist.

Usually in films the main character is supposed to change or at least learn a lesson from the beginning to the end. Here his character is basically the same and learns nothing. He just changes his outlook a bit.

The Film is about a cynical Scientist who decides to take in a southern runaway and marries her then all of a sudden her parents come to new york to be reunited with her and take her back home and find themselves under the spell of New York to change there lives and be there true selves.

Woody Allen has said that this was not a new script he wrote recently but a script he wrote in the seventies that he never really finished so he stuck it in a drawer and only recently found it and finished it. Maybe there was a good reason he hid it away back then. He was a lot sharper of mind and probably realized it wasn’t that good or original so e hid it away now he seems to be running out of steam so he finally makes it because he really can’t think of anything. That is also how the film plays no insight or effort it just lays there. While some of the ideas are still there and funny it feels uninspired.

One of the main problems of the film is that there never seems to be anything at risk for any of the characters in any way shape or form. No emotional changes they just seem to exist and very few things happen then they change slightly. The only real change is in lifestyle for the two supporting characters who come to New York and stop being repressed and open up to a new lifestyle. Yet it happens so quick and gimmicky it just feels false.

Even the ending is too neatly wrapped up in a cute cookie cutter kind of way.    

I am a huge woody Allen fan and a big Larry David film and found this disappointing not as bad as Allen’s recent dreadful output but not too much better either. As usual it has it’s charms but if the film was made by any other director it would be considered subpar. It’s only noteworthy because of Mr. Allen and Mr. David. Watch only if you are a completist.

 GRADE: D

Directed By: Lee Daniels
Written By: Geoffrey Fletcher
Cinematography By: Andrew Dunn
Editor: Joe Klotz

CAST: Gabourey Sibibe, Monique, Paula Patton, Sherri Shepherd, Lenny Kravitz, Mariah Carey

Yes that is truly the whole film title.

The film is a emotional rollercoaster. While not as depressing as I thought it would be. It is a truly dark film.

If you have seen Lee Daniels Previous films As Director (Shadow Boxer) or Producer (Monster’s Ball, The Woodsman) you would know he is drawn to these types of subjects. While He is not the greatest directors he does have a talent for bringing out amazing performances from actors you would never think had it in them.

This film makes you feel all over the place in different scenes. You will Feel Happy, Hopeful, Mad and Sad. It’s a film you have to experience more then anyone can describe it to you. It certainly had a effect on the audience I watched it with. The audience could hardly contain there reactions to the film, Scenes and characters. I’m not going to bore you with the plot you can look it up and the film is honestly better the less you know going in. This is definitely not a movie for kids. Not even to take as a lesson of hope. 

Each Scene that involves precious and her mother feels like a old west showdown. The Two titans in one room circling each other each with there hands on there guns. Only the mother has the home court advantage as she is scary and she never gets up out of her chair. It’s almost like a horror film the tension is always that thick between the two of them.  

Some of the artistic flourishes get a little annoying but you get through those easily enough. at times it seems like it is trying to hard in those scenes but understandable if you look at them as metaphors.

Thank god for the scenes of hope that break up the gloom and tension. The scenes of precious in school or around her classmates actually, brung a smile to my face as it helped lighten the mood and showed hope.

The performances are good all around even in the Minor roles. Monique totally transforms into her character Of Precious’s mother and a true face of evil a monster in human skin. Her performance is definitely notable and Oscar worthy. Even the roles played by Lenny Kravitz and Mariah Carey could have been distracting but they fit right in and never take you out of the film.  

I know I maybe reviewing more with my emotions then with technical aspects of the film. But at times some of the best films or many people’s favorites are more based o emotional reactions then visual dynamics.

The film says it’s based on a true story because there are real Precious’s out there going through this. This film just tries to put a face on the people involved and a voice for those who can’t speak out.

I can’t say enough about how good this film is. While not the best film of the year it certainly will affect you somehow. I know this will not be some of you out there’s cup of tea but give it a chance it will surprise you.

Definitely a must see.

GRADE: A-

Directed By: Todd Louiso
Written By: Todd Louiso & Jared Koskoff
Cinematography By: Tim Suhrstedt
Editor: Julie Monroe 

CAST: Ben Stiller, Jason Schwartzman, Anna Kendrick, Jay Paulson, Ebon

Moss-Bacharach

Not as bad as ENVY but still very disappointing.

I can see why the film was released for one week and dumped straight to DVD. But really shouldn’t the studio have known this wouldn’t work in the script stage. The film feels like a treatment that needs to be expanded on while being written.

Not exactly a comedy Dream Team as the previous film mentioned but I would expect better from a film with both Ben Stiller and Jason Schwartzman.

The film is about Marc Pease who had stage fright and ran away during a high school production of the wiz who seems to be stuck in arrested development from his high school years as he dates a girl in high school drops by the school so much everyone knows him he still thinks Ben Stiller’s character is his mentor though he avoids him all the time he is even selling his house so he can pay for recording a album with his acapella group he’s had since high school. But now as the schools production of The Wiz get’s closer his life slowly falls apart.

The main problem is, where is the comedy? This film is supposed to be a comedy but it’s not funny there doesn’t even seem to be any jokes. I think there is humor in it but it never comes out.

I don’t exactly know why Ben stiller is in it he really has nothing to do and looks bored and tired I don’t know if he just wanted to help the production by being in it. Because the film really gives him nothing to do. Which when I found out he filmed his role in 2 weeks it came as no surprise.

Jason Schwartzman At least puts a lot of energy into his performance so at least he is trying.

One of the major flaws with this film is as noted before there is nothing to watch really it’s not drama it’s not comedy so what is it. It’s unfocused the little plot there is needs to be expanded upon to make a actual film at least a interesting one. The film could have gone in so many directions it has a beginning but that seems to be it. I only really enjoyed one scene and that is the performance at the end of the Wiz. That is everything the film should have been funny, energetic, flashy.

GRADE:  F

Directed By: Chris Columbus
Written By: Larry Doyle (Based On His Book)
Cinematography By: Phil Abraham
Editor: Peter Honess

CAST: Paul Rust, Hayden Panettiere, Jack T. Carpenter, Lauren London, Lauren Storm, Shawn Roberts, Samm Levine, Andrea Savage, Alan Ruck, Cynthia Stevenson, Patt Finn

This is a disappointment considering I loved the book so much. Soon as I heard that Hayden Panettiere Was staring as Beth Cooper I knew it was doomed. I thought in the hands of Chris Columbus this could be decent but this is studio chis Columbus not early screenwriting whiz Chris Columbus the man behind YOUNG SHERLOCK HOLMES.

Basically that is what is wrong with the film the cast is just strange. But I can’t blame Mr. Columbus Totally since the screenplay is written by the author of the book. Who initially had the idea to write this as a screenplay but when there was no interest decided to write is as a book to garner more interest and low and behold they decided to make it into a film. But the funny thing is that it was better as a book!!! With a better ending that felt full while being ambiguous while this one just feels dead.

The film feels like it was sanitized from the book so it could play to younger teens but keeping some Raunch so that it doesn’t seem too tame. It’s a film that talks down to its audience by just lumping in one slapstick violent scene to the next. Instead of sticking to a novel that managed to be funny, Naughty but also reminded you of what it was like to be young and have that passion for a girl of your dreams. With your future ahead of you. This film just feels gimmicky. It has no soul.

The film is a perfect timewaster but you won’t laugh much or remember too much afterwards, it makes a threesome not sexy at all nor funny. This film will be perfect to put on television as you don’t really have to cut anything. Plus the characters don’t remind me of any real teenagers at all. This film came and went to theaters with hardly a blip on the screen. Which is not all that surprising since as soon as I saw the trailer I knew it was doomed. It wasn’t funny and felt like it was trying way too hard. It was a struggle and after i saw the trailer my heart broke. When it comes to the cast.

Paul Rust is a good actor with a strange look but he still looks to old to be in this film. I thought it was impossible but the film finds a way to make Lauren London not attractive plus it doesn’t give her much to do. Hayden penirette is attractive but she doesn’t have the look or character to play this dream girl that many men obsess over she looks just regular to me. Plus her character half the time seems a little off or crazy and her later reasoning make no sense in the film. Plus with the age difference of her and the male lead it makes him more look like a molester then a paramour. The only actor who comes off good is Jack T. Carpenter, Who plays his sexually confused best friend while he is funny I only wish it was in a better film. This film is not horrible but it’s not good or decent either.

Maybe a good pick for older highly clean cut kids but all others will be bored except for maybe senior citizens.

Wait for TV. Which I’m sure it will be on in no time.

GRADE: D

Directed By: Jeff Stilson
Written By: Lance Crouther, Chris Rock, Jeff Stilson, Chuck Sklar
Cinematography By: Cliff Charles & Mark Henderson
Editor: Paul Marchand & Greg Nash 

Featuring: Raven Symone, Eve, Salt N’ Pepa, Lauren London, Maya Angelou, Andre Harrell, Sarah Jones, Nia long, Tracie Thoms, Vanessa Bell Calloway, Megan Goode, Melyssa Ford, Al Sharpton, Ice-T, Paul Mooney, KRS-ONE, 

This is a must see. It’s not the greatest documentary of all time but it is like a Michael Moore documentary in other words it’s a documentary for people who don’t usually like or go to documentry’s it’s funny while being informative and bringing up emotions of course the film has the celebrity interviews to bring more people in to see them give there personal account of the subject but that is not the whole film it’slike a little boost now and then

Good hair is about the business and culture of black women and there hair the processes they go through to be what is taught to them to be beautiful by straightening and having long hair. It not only follows the culture by talking to hairdressers and the women who are paying big bucks for this but it also talks to business owners and the place where most of this hair is coming from India. While exploring this it is also follows the Bronner Brothers hair show and the competition for hairstylist of the year. The subjects are almost as entertaining as the film and some easily walk away with the film.

Though the film is hosted by chris rock he is not the director he is the producer and host because this subject is something he wanted to explore but he is the one asking all the questions and helping to explain everything. While showing sad and hostile scenes and making them a little more bearable and calm through comedy. But you can’t help but think a lot of times he gets answers and access a little more easier because of his celebrity status. Without that it might have been a little harder to gain access to certain places. 

The film is much like the skit when Chris Rock hosted the scars, and he went to a black movie theater and asked them about the Oscar nominated films. Through his comedy he is exploring and shining a light on a broader serious subject.

The shameful facts of the film are aplenty like the fact that African Americans are 12% of the population but 90% of the fake hair business a billion dollar business that only 5 % of African Americans own any of the businesses. Most of the companies are owned or run by Koreans. The Fact that as a African American it seems so hard to keep our own money in our community and we willingly gie it away to others who make money off of our community but don’t respect us is a on-going problem and another reason why it seems hard for us to come together and have any power as a community. The film is certainly an eye opener. Plus as African American cinema it is a film that needs to be supported so that more black cinema can be made and cultivated since there is so little of it out there. 

As usual I was enjoying the film so much I only wished it had been longer.

GRADE:  B+   

Directed By: Craig Gilliespie
Written By: Michael Carnes & Josh Gilbert
Cinematography By: Tami Reiker
Editor: Kevin Tent & Alan Baumgarten

Cast: Seann William Scott, Susan Sarandon, Billy Bob Thornton, Ethan Suplee, Amy Poehler, Tyra Banks, Brent Briscoe, Melissa Sagemiller, Melissa Leo, Sarah Chalke, M.C. Gainey

Why oh why?  This film involves actors I usually like but they seem wasted in this film

This is pretty much a one joke movie about what if not only was the biggest bully in your life your high school gym teacher who made your life hell but then years later he is dating your mom and going to become your step-dad. Now imagine your whole career has been made being a self-help guru from bettering yourself to not be the person you once were and then you are forced to face the person who makes you feel bad about yourself. Now this is great for a skit or tv-sitcom but for a 90 minute movie is torture.

Seann William scott seems sedated in this movie as almost every other actor goes over the top the only other actor who seems to match him is billy bob thornton who seems to either be sleepwalking or bored to death in his quest for his paycheck. Amy poehler is funny as usual but wisely she is hardly in the movie. Ethan suplee acts like he wants to make his character a breakout star.

There were only rally two funny scenes one involves mr. woodcock thinking sean William scott is a burglar and beats him the other is a supposed homemade video of mr. woodcock abusing one of his students. That’s really it other scenes try hard but the harder they try the more humor they drain form the scene and situation.

The film tries to make us feel for mr. woodcock towards the end by making him human and sympathetic in his own way the only problem is it doesn’t make sense since we have seen his behavior before and that is not so forgiveable like admitting he picked on these kids for no real reason. He says making them real men but many seem messed up except for one student who was successful. Telling Sean William scott’s character about his and his mother’s sex life.

The ending feels rushed and tacked on like they didn’t know how to end the film. This is another example of a film that didn’t need to be made or at least needed to be worked on before it was fast tracked and filmed there is a reason this was kept on a shelf for two years there was no way to save this film just like there is no way you should watch it.          

 GRADE:  F

Directed By: Arie Posin
Written By: Arie Posin (Story); Zac Stanford (Screenplay)
Cinematography By: Lawrence Shor
Editor: William S. Schraf & Arthur Schmidt 

CAST: Jamie Bell, Camilla Belle, Alison Janney, Glenn Close, William Fichtner, Lou Taylor Pucci, Justin Chatwin,  Jason Issacs, Rita Wilson, John Heard, Carrie-Anne Moss, Ralph Fiennes, Rory Culkin, Lauren Holly, Caroline Goodall

Well apart from not the best title in the world.

Despite having a All-Star cast the material never rises above it’s quirky to be quirky premise.

The film seeks to be a Deep, Dark Comedy that comes off as Idiosyncratic comedy that deep down wants to be a satire of the suburbs and teenage alienation.

The story involves a teenagers suicide and the ramifications that it has through the small community. The teenager was selling drugs to his peers and without a constant supply they try to get his best friend to get them drugs when he refuses they kidnap his brother and hold him ransom the only thing is they kidnap the wrong kid. That is just one of the story threads in this of the characters are messed up in there own way. The title comes from a video game the kids all play that seems to mirror there lives.

The film seems to be what a Hollywood studio thinks a indie movie is supposed to be. The elements are there the All-Star cast that seems to be partially slumming because the material is so rich only here it is not. It has satire and social commentary with a handful of dramatic moments. A good looking young cast.

The only real dramatic moments or scenes that felt real come at the beginning and ending of the film.

Certain characters are memorable and hold there own in there scenes to ground the movie a little like Glenn close in the film.

The direction is stylish, I only wish the he had the material to match it.

Wait For Cable.

GRADE: C-